Music/title: Dreams; Beck
“Ahhhh, here we are…
Running circles around around around around.”
. … ..
I’ve never been quite this close.
Just the taste of it- Christ.
I’ve wanted this for so long.
Dreamed about it.
All pieces are fitting so perfectly.
My bubble- Almost complete.
So much work;
So many awful experiences just to get to this moment.
I truly have dreamed of a place to call home.
…And it’s finally within my grasp.
/ / /
Oh just you wait and see.
Music/title: Trojans (Xaphoon Jones Remix); Atlas Genius
“Take a look, Hesitate.
Take a picture you could never recreate.”
.. . …
Not so lazy Sunday.
Remember the endless fog a few months back?
…I sure do. ::smiles::
Is it possible for a landscape to convey emotion?
[ I like to think so. ]
Music/title: Phantoms and Friends; Old Man Canyon
“I know all your names,
Pointing different ways,
Let me out.”
. . .. .. ..
Up, and up, and up,
And down we go.
….Ist das nicht immer so?
/ / /
So now it’s time to see the cards you’re dealt..
Music/title: Riptide; Vance Joy
“Oh, oh, and they come unstuck.”
. .. ….
Go back five years ago,
and I’d never have taken it.
Go back a few years ago,
and I’d have definitely considered it.
Go back a week ago,
and I almost asked you for it.
You always find a cure before I find the disease.
….Can we do this again?
/ / /
And she’s been living on the highest shelf…
; Imagine Dragons
“I’m going back to my roots.”
. .. …
Perhaps this is how it’s meant to end..
Maybe that’s just it– Maybe we’re never really meant to know the outcome
our Oh-so-Irreverent choices lead us to believe we’re dealt.
My choices? …..I fucking hate them.
Just like every other human on the planet-
I want my life simple. Complete.
We want this cookie cutter lifestyle, but here we always are…
Dealing ourselves another round of cards, when the game is over and lost.
Do we ever really quit?
Is there ever really an “end game” like they lead us to believe?
I s’pose here’s to finding out….
/ / /
Written near the end of last year, but god be damned- I couldn’t end my project on such a depressing note…
So here we are. Updated blog, with non-uplifting thoughts.
More to come. ::smiles::
Music/title: Let’s Fall In Love Some More; Al Bairre
“I need some sun in my eyes.”
You need to backtrack your ground, love.
What the fuck do you think you’re doing!? ..Think you can keep it up?
….Let’s hope you’re not mistaken.
/ / /
You’re nothing, you’re nothing…
Music/title: Fog; From Indian Lakes
“But if you get up now, you can try to survive.”
. . .. …
I would’ve given you anything in that moment-
Whatever you named, it was yours…
Holding your head in my lap, as I did a year ago…
I felt your tears streaming onto my skin-
My heart aching to watch you desperately cling to the boy inside.
You’re never really old enough to deal with these things.
….And I’m sorry you have to.
/ / /
I’ve been trying to figure it out my whole life…
Music/title: We Follow; From Indian Lakes
“At the time, my life just seemed too complete, and maybe we have to break everything to make something better out of ourselves.”
~Chuck Palahniuk; Fight Club
. . .. .
Is this what we’re to become?
[ ..Is this what you really deserve? ]
/ / /
I think I’ve heard that before..
Music/title: Lean On (Major Lazer x DJ Snake feat. MØ cover); Miracles of Modern Science
“The nights are long,
Longing for you to come home…”
. . ..
How am I supposed to do this?
How am I supposed to give up my time with you for them?
I was so ready not long ago,
And now I’m doubting every urge within myself.
Something tells me I will just know when it’s right, but what if I’m too late?
What if my mind is ready, but my body has far past its limitations?
I fucking hate this.
I hate the urges. I hate the pressure. I don’t even fucking WANT them.
YOU are the only reason I want any of this…
Am I so wrong to be terrified that they will take you away?
Then who would I be?
Surely not the person that created this ‘love’…..
/ / /
All we need is somebody to lean on..
Music/title: Bad Body; Miracles of Modern Science
“Just momentarily, temporarily permanent.”
. . .. ..
Sometimes there is just no fixing it.
/ / /
“No, let’s just look at pictures on the internet..”