Music/title: Some Assembly Required; Abhi The Nomad (ft. Foster)
“Is my pleasure, divine center.”
Three deep, so far so good.
It’s different this time.
Everything is getting less complicated.
I’m afraid to get too comfortable.
Seems there’s always something to drag me down.
But.. Maybe not.
Maybe that’s what they mean by growth?
We can only grow from experiences.
We can only learn from living-
From the success to the catastrophic failures, we achieve…
That’s just it;
They are all achievements.
And in the end, it all accumulates to the same:
…We are the stuff of stars.
Music/title: End Credits; EDEN
“Cause happy endings hardest to fake.”
. . ….
It didn’t sting nearly as much this time..
[ We did her a favor, really. ]
The colder it gets, the easier it becomes-
But you’d never guess.
I’ll bet you think I don’t have a heartless bone in my body.
That’s where you’d be wrong.
/ / /
So let’s run..
Label This Love; From Indian Lakes
“You belong in your own skin.”
Nothing to say this week, only to show…
/ / /
Am I still clean enough?
Music/title: Selfish; The Reverb Junkie
“Well now you know,
Now you know.”
. .. ..
The beginning is always easy.
/ / /
“Oh, if I knew you were a…”
Music/title: Don’t Fuck This Up; Andrew Applepie
“I swear I’m not trying to fuck you up.”
I saw myself in her;
A former self-
A truly dedicated slave.
Surely she’s still alive in there.
The older I get, the further away it becomes.
A more distant dream.
One I used to have, to want daily..
Where did it go?
Who have I become?
It’s okay if I like the changes, right?
[ You know you could always ask him.
He knows more about you than you think.
..Don’t forget how this all began. ]
/ / /
Good Mythical Morning.
Music/title: Brazil; Declan McKenna
…What have I become?
. . ..
Each holiday with him feels more as it should’ve growing up.
/ / /
I miss creating my little frozen pieces of time.
Admittedly, I’m considering another photo project here-
Show of hands who would be in favor of this in the coming year?
Music/title: Oceans; The Fray
“There goes the sun, oceans away!”
. . . ..
Better and better it gets.
This is where I needed to be.
I want it all.
I want everything life took from me- All of it.
I refuse to feel guilt,
because I deserve this.
The hand life deals does not dictate the end result- don’t you let anyone tell you otherwise.
I should be dead.
But I am not.
So throw away those shitty cards.
Open a new deck- A new world.
Re-imagine life the way you want,
And take it.
Music/title: Wasted On You (feat. ROZES); Louis Futon
“I’m wasted on you.”
. . … .. …..
Liberating doesn’t begin to cover it.
A twinge of denial, maybe.
I still can’t believe it all. Everything seems so surreal in our lives.
Did you plan this from the start?
A part of me believes I had nothing to do with it. That it was all thanks to others. The bad parts of my mind attempt to latch on- hopes of some form of sabotage..
..the other side.
The part that has drug me through all the blood and tears… That part is proud.
Look at how far you’ve come. ..Look at what you’ve done for yourself..
Aren’t you so happy now?
If I ever believed in a God,
now would be the time to thank him.
/ / /
We keep it going just like we always do, we do..
Music/title: Moonlight; Grace Vanderwaal
“These will be a life long stories.”
. . …
Four days and counting.
If you could see me now..
My life- In boxes again.
But this time I am making a home for myself.
I am creating everything that you took from me.
I am in control.
And you won’t ever take it from me again.
Music/title: Kill V. Maim; Grimes
“Oh, the fire, it’s alright.
The people touch it-
I can’t touch it, even though it’s mine.”
. .. …
I couldn’t think of a single trait of hers I carried within me.
Was I happy?
Would I really want to be like her?
I sure used to think so.
I haven’t thought of her in a while.
I haven’t needed to.
She could be dead with all the others as far as I know.
…Wouldn’t that be a treat.
Do you think most daughters wish their mothers dead today?
…Can you even stomach the concept?
/ / /
And I do what I can.