I’m sick of words that hang above my head- What about the kid? (It’s time the kid got FREE)

01-13-17-0
Music/title: Sleepless Club (WEKEED Boot); Lorde vs Flume
_ _

 

Take the pill, make it too real.
The other day I forgot my old address. I’m sitting pretty on the throne.
There’s nothing more I want, except to be alone..

. . ….. … ..

 

“There was no real sense of life,
because she had nothing to contrast it with.
The lower you fall, the higher you’ll fly.
The farther you run, the more God wants you back.

Only if we’re caught and punished can we be saved.”

~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

 

/ / /

 

It’s a day for words and curves.
Where do you see yourself at the end of your life?

Comment for me.

 

[03/05] And I’m gonna have to learn that this love will never be convenient, convenient… (Oh, convenient)

06.09.16 -2
Music/title: Tattooed Tears; The Front Bottoms
_ _

 

I hear her whisper,
“All I want is to want nothing.”

.. . ..

 

You wanted me to want it for so long.
Your dream- Your idea of ‘perfect beauty’ all wrapped up in a singular, well-formed package.
And then suddenly the dream is a forced reality.
And my formerly structured self perspective falls to pieces within my own hands.
 

You say, “No, that’s not right.”
It wasn’t supposed to happen this way…
Yeah, well-

“You can’t teach God anything.”

 

 

And I can’t tell you the reality brings my confidence to tears….
 

/ / /

 
There is no music when we kiss…

You’ve got a heart filled with passion… Will you let it burn for hate or compassion?

R1-01479-0003
Music/title: Killing For Love; Jose Gonzalez
_ _

 

“Killing for love.”

.. . . ..

 

Now it’s 11:03pm,
And I know that I will be a different person by the end of this year-
A better version of myself.
 

Shouldn’t that be how it always is?
Mustn’t we always strive to become a better, more complete version of ourselves?

I used to think, ‘I want to be done.’
But now, I almost want the exact opposite… [ “May we never be complete!” ]
 
. .. . . ..

 

 

Now it’s 11:11pm.
Time to let the chips fall where they may…
 

02.21.15 [22/52] And now I wonder if it’s meant to be- Desolation, tragedy… (Is there nothing good in me?)

02.22.15 -0
Music/title: Release; Imagine Dragons
_ _

 

“A moment was the most you could ever expect from perfection.”

. .. . .

 

I wonder if this is the height of it all?
I feel I’ve been here before..  Everything so perfect and in it’s place-  A calm before the storm.
I can feel the entropy taking over again…

 

I need to get this air out of my lungs.

 

/ / /

 
Oh, let me have release…

02.07.15 [20/52] And your wrist got bruised, and you wanted better love… Well, it’s sleeping in your bedroom.

02.07.15
Music/title: Walking The Dog; Fun.
_ _

 

“I’ve met God across his long walnut desk with his diplomas hanging
on the wall behind him, and God asks me, “Why?”  Why did I cause so much pain?
Didn’t I realize that each of us is a sacred, unique snowflake of special unique specialness?
Can’t I see how we’re all manifestations of love?

I look at God behind his desk, taking notes on a pad, but God’s got this all wrong.
We are not special.  We are not crap or trash, either.  We just are.
We just are, and what happens just happens.
And God says, “No, that’s not right.”

Yeah.  Well.  Whatever.  You can’t teach God anything.”

~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

 

/ / /

 
Hold on, stay on my side, don’t go…

12.27.14 [14/52] She said, “Paint a picture on me, throw your dress up, and your heart away.”

12.21.14 -8
Music/title: Besitos; Pierce the Veil
_ _

 

“I felt like destroying something beautiful.”

. .. . . ..

 
What is it really?
 

Is it this body? [ You tell me I’m beautiful, therefor I must be. ]
What about this photo? ..Is this what beauty looks like? [ I think it’s beautiful, therefor it must be. ]
Sometimes I get the urge to bite into flesh until I taste the blood on my lips.

 

Now that.

 
..Wouldn’t that be beautiful.
 

/ / /
 

Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce the selfish machine.

Fuck you if you love a car for it’s paint job; love you if you love a car for the road trips. (Show me the miles on your arms..)

03.08.13. -2
 
Music/title: Sloppy Seconds; Watsky
_ _
 
 
Let’s throw everything to the wind. Let’s say, ‘Fuck it all!’ Let’s evolve; let the chips fall where they may.
And never question the actions we have with the best intentions.
You want to feel invincible?
 
Just be..
 
… .. . .. . .
 
“But don’t paint me like the good guy ‘cause every time I write
I get to choose the angle that you view me, and select the nicest light.”

 
~ Tiny Glowing Screens (Part 2); Watsky
 

08.22.12 [239] Things won’t change until we do.

08.22.12

 
Music/title: Changes (Shlohmo Remix); LOL Boys
_ _
 
 
“I have these feelings for you,” He says as he runs a hand down my arched back and perfectly displayed ass. “..Some might call them love.” He grips my ass tightly; admiring his property.
 
“I have feelings for you that some might call love as well, Sir.” I tighten my position. I want to turn to him, to ask him to hurt me …that I desperately want to hurt for him. This is the only way I can think to show him how much I love and trust him.
 
I would’ve let him destroy me right in that moment. I would’ve gladly let him break me until I didn’t recognize myself as a person anymore. I don’t know if it was my love for him, or my complete devotion as a slave that felt such a pull to give myself to him. But, my god, how I’ve missed being this..
 
“It’s only after we’ve lost everything, that we’re free to do anything.”
 
 
/ / /
 
He finally said it. Later, after everything else… “I do love you.”
And he said it again the next day, and the next..