Music/title: Black Beatles; Our Last Night
“There is nothing to explain.”
. . …
Only two more weeks until I hit refresh on this life.
Sometimes I wish I had parents to see how far I’ve progressed.
And it’s time like these that I miss her. Or the idea of her, at least.
I wonder if she’s sane enough to feel regret.
I wonder if I truly care anymore.
Music/title: Oh Devil; Electric Guest
“And deep inside,
I’m sure I got here all by myself.”
. . .
Two years since I’ve been here.
Surely you’d think I was scared,
But quite the contrary.
I know myself better these days than ever before-
What’s to be scared of?
I felt like taking something more.. harsh.
A bit of rough edges, to match…
What kind of girl are you now?
Music/title: It’s Only (feat. Zyra); ODESZA
“It’s only slaughter,
We’re only liars,
It’s only blood.”
To be wanted; to be needed- A mutual addiction.
It’s all you ever desired, Da?
Such a strong emotion...
But you sure know that, don’t you?
[ yes. ]
I know you miss it- The way it’s all played..
That’s why you choose them, isn’t it?
Because who else could control what you have obtained..
The psycho and sociopaths.
The unloved and unwanted of society- You crave them;
Crave the mutual addiction of the unattainable.
[ “They’re only thoughts that I’m having;
Thoughts safe within my head.” ]
To be wanted; to be needed is simple.
Oh, but to be desired by them….
True emotional ecstasy.
. . .
"You’re only crying, you’re only dying, you’re only dead."
Music/title: Winter Breaks Me; Danielle Ate the Sandwich
“Give me what you came for,
(Give me something better.)”
. ….. .
How was that?
[ How are we? ]
Sometimes I wish we had a destination;
A place we could finally be close enough.
Do you remember?
That first year?
We more than kissed.
You more than held me.
The year nothing felt close enough.
How that was,
How we are-
I s’pose this is just that.
Music/title: Say My Name (feat. Zyra); ODESZA
“So take a chance,
Take a chance.”
.. … .
Stop. Rewind. And reorder everything.
Is this not all you ever thought it would be?
This beautiful life you’ve created.
The world everyone envies….
Is it enough?
[ Has it ever really been so? ]
Let’s escape these all encompassing thoughts;
Keep them from slowly, surely dissecting from the inside out.
You think you want to preserve this life?
Oh, my dear love,
You’ve never wanted to preserve anything….