Music/title: Moonlight; Grace Vanderwaal
_ _
. . …
Four days and counting.
If you could see me now..
My life- In boxes again.
But this time I am making a home for myself.
I am creating everything that you took from me.
I am in control.
And you won’t ever take it from me again.
Music/title: Black Beatles; Our Last Night
_ _
. . …
Only two more weeks until I hit refresh on this life.
Sometimes I wish I had parents to see how far I’ve progressed.
And it’s time like these that I miss her. Or the idea of her, at least.
I wonder if she’s sane enough to feel regret.
I wonder if I truly care anymore.
Music/title: #Grownupz; FEiN
_ _
. …. .
If only I’d known…
I think of where I’ve come, and what I’ve done in my life-
As a child others would ask what I wanted to be when I grew up.
I imagine most children aspire to make a difference; a change in the world.
Not me.
All I saw in my life was the horror of being locked in that house.
No friends. No family. No escape.
I would think, ‘Why would I want these complicated things they desire?’
For me, the common dreams were beyond grasp.
But, more than that-
I didn’t feel the hunger for them.
What did I want out of my life?
What were my dreams?
.
[ I suppose..
…Someone to love me. Someone *I* can love!
Someone that won’t hurt me the way everyone else does.. And… A home.
Something the complete opposite of now!
A place of my own to spend time with the person I love.. ]
.
Almost two decades later…
People ask me if I’m excited to be purchasing my first home..
If only they knew.
/ / /
Music/title: Young Robot; Dance Gavin Dance
_ _
. ..
I thought I would enjoy firing her.
It was so justified, you know?
But here I am.
Drinking with Dance Gavin Dance.. Reminiscing in 2013.
What am I doing?
*sigh*
Two more months.
I can keep it together for two more months. ..Right?
/ / /
Music/title: Good Morning; Grouplove
_ _
. . ..
I’ll never understand other women.
I’m just trying to be a manager, buy a house- be an adult
And they are just a bunch of dramatic bitches cry babies.
You’ll never get anywhere in life, if you don’t grow a fucking pair. Christ.
Ranting aside, yes!
I am buying a house. Or at least in the process of doing so.
HOW EXCITING! :D
Really-
We are beyond excited. We’ve been looking since January, and it’s picture perfect. Literally- I’m going to take a million pictures, because the house is a piece of fucking art. GAH.
The floors…
*sighs*
…Just you wait and see.
/ / /
p.s. A late 2016 selfie treat. ::smiles::
Music/title: Round Two; Imad Royal
_ _
. . ….
“We loved you.”
.
I swear, in that moment I could’ve flown….
/ / /
There’s a clear purpose to it all;
There’s a goal.
The first step achieved-
And now?
.
“Round two.”
Music/title: Waves; Electric Guest
_ _
. . .
More uneventful than most birthdays, I would say.
Yet, with the right company-
One of the best…….
.
Dear Arden,
I love you.
I’d take a gluten free snack adventure over gifts any day.
Bunches of love,
wifeo13.
/ / /
Music/title: Kill V. Maim; Grimes
_ _
. .. …
I couldn’t think of a single trait of hers I carried within me.
Was I happy?
Would I really want to be like her?
I sure used to think so.
I haven’t thought of her in a while.
I haven’t needed to.
She could be dead with all the others as far as I know.
…Wouldn’t that be a treat.
Do you think most daughters wish their mothers dead today?
…Can you even stomach the concept?
/ / /
Music/title: Oh Devil; Electric Guest
_ _
. . .
Two years since I’ve been here.
Surely you’d think I was scared,
But quite the contrary.
I know myself better these days than ever before-
What’s to be scared of?
I felt like taking something more.. harsh.
A bit of rough edges, to match…
.
What kind of girl are you now?
Music/title: Go With It; TOKiMONSTA
_ _
/ / /
…Does this make me weak?
Words. Wares. Woomph.
Simple truths and stories by an uncommon man. Check out more on Quadracon.blogspot.com
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