My life, my love, my drive, it came from… Pain! (You made me a, you made me a believer, believer)


Music/title: Believer; Imagine Dragons
_ _

 

“Don’t you tell me what you think that I can be.”

… . .

 

Again.
and Again. and Again.
It’s what you want, right?
Your goals quickly coming to an end.

Who will you be now?
What will inflict the pain you so desire?

. . 

“You made me a,
You made me a believer.”

/ / /

 
Never ending shifting.
The changes are so frequent lately I can’t keep up.
But we’re happy if we’re not paying too close attention to the detail, right?

Happy…

 

Yes.
I do believe I am.

I fell in love at the open houses, I felt a little bit broken ’bout it. And now I know- You know I’ll follow you but.. (Where do we go from here?)

01-21-17-10
Music/title: Where Do We Go From Here?; Al Bairre
_ _

 

“Cause I saw the good and the bad in me,
But never which one I should be.”

. . .. ….. .

 

Is it real this time?
Am I finally reaching the surface?

A home.
A true home.
It all happened so fast- I was so against it, and then… It clicked; Everything fell into place. And now I can’t imagine anything else. My resolve deteriorates as we speak; My heart beating faster at the idea…

Do you know what this means to me?

No more boxes.
No more unsettled tendencies.

 

[ Does this mean I will finally feel complete? ]

.

No, love.
There is no such thing as complete.
Don’t you see?
We are never done,
But.. We are fulfilled.
We are happy,
and happier upon losing the unhappiness.
Don’t you see..?

.
 

[ Da, We are to survive.
And this is just the beginning… ]

[02/05] ‘Cause you were high school, and I was just more like real life.. (And you were okay, okay)

06.09.16 -1
Music/title: Father; The Front Bottoms
_ _

 

“I’ll do the pushups,
I’ll wear the makeup.”

.. .. …
 

It feels almost as if I’ve misplaced the entire door to my home-
Left wandering aimlessly with keys in hand.

It’s coming back.
Slowly, but surely…

 

..I’m finding the door to myself again.

/ / /

 
I’ll do whatever he wants all night.

But it’s collisions we need to remind us that we’re alive…

011
Music/title: This Ain’t No Place For Animals; Hands Like Houses
_ _

 

“Tear back the skin to find,
to chase a pulse back home.”

.. . …

 

[ Life is just so goddamn hard… Every time I get to the good parts, it feels like something else takes them away. I feel one day I won’t be able to handle anything else, and that I’ll just break down. ]

 
“Then I will pick your pieces back up and put you back together.
Because I will never let you give up.  And even if you can’t believe in yourself,
I will make you believe in the me that believes in you.”

 

/ / /

 
And we still know nothing…

This shit my favorite song, you just don’t know the words… (But I still fuck with you, you just ain’t never heard)


Music/title: Favorite Song (feat. Childish Gambino); Chance The Rapper
_ _

 

Fuck just settling…

 
You think you’re going to get there by accepting the passable?
I say, fuck regret!  Fuck conforming to these prepackaged lives we’re dealt-
And screw the ever living out of the hand you’ve been thrown!
You weren’t given the lifestyle you want?

 

…Go out and fucking get it.