Music/title: End Credits; EDEN
“Cause happy endings hardest to fake.”
. . ….
It didn’t sting nearly as much this time..
[ We did her a favor, really. ]
The colder it gets, the easier it becomes-
But you’d never guess.
I’ll bet you think I don’t have a heartless bone in my body.
That’s where you’d be wrong.
/ / /
So let’s run..
Music/title: Over and Over; Al Bairre
Sometimes it’s meant to end this way.
. . .
Music/title: Believer; Imagine Dragons
“Don’t you tell me what you think that I can be.”
… . .
and Again. and Again.
It’s what you want, right?
Your goals quickly coming to an end.
Who will you be now?
What will inflict the pain you so desire?
“You made me a,
You made me a believer.”
/ / /
Never ending shifting.
The changes are so frequent lately I can’t keep up.
But we’re happy if we’re not paying too close attention to the detail, right?
I do believe I am.
Music/title: Phantoms and Friends; Old Man Canyon
“I know all your names,
Pointing different ways,
Let me out.”
. . .. .. ..
Up, and up, and up,
And down we go.
….Ist das nicht immer so?
/ / /
So now it’s time to see the cards you’re dealt..
Music/title: Where Do We Go From Here?; Al Bairre
“Cause I saw the good and the bad in me,
But never which one I should be.”
. . .. ….. .
Is it real this time?
Am I finally reaching the surface?
A true home.
It all happened so fast- I was so against it, and then… It clicked; Everything fell into place. And now I can’t imagine anything else. My resolve deteriorates as we speak; My heart beating faster at the idea…
Do you know what this means to me?
No more boxes.
No more unsettled tendencies.
[ Does this mean I will finally feel complete? ]
There is no such thing as complete.
Don’t you see?
We are never done,
But.. We are fulfilled.
We are happy,
and happier upon losing the unhappiness.
Don’t you see..?
[ Da, We are to survive.
And this is just the beginning… ]
Music/title: We Are The Sound; Alexisonfire
“Say you want it, you need it.”
If only my heart could harden to match yours.
Perhaps you saw the coldness inside of me first-
Why do I feel such a compulsion to watch you at your best?
Perhaps I am still trying to outdo the darkness living inside..
Something to truly brings me to my knees.
Isn’t that all I ever want?
To be your slave?
Through their death.
I don’t know who I am anymore.
/ / /
There is nothing but anger burning inside of me..
Music/title: Ghost; From Indian Lakes
“I can’t look away,
but I don’t wanna meet your eyes.”
.. . . …. .
Do you see me making an effort?
I’m trying, really. I truly am.
But it’s hard. My thoughts are pressing against all the happiness I feel.
Why am I so sad lately?
…Not depressed sadness, but a feeling of longing. An overwhelming, consistent wave of emotions.
Is this my body trying to tell me it’s time? Have I waited too long?
Your skin is never close enough to mine. ..why am I this unsettled?
You are there.
Everyday, you are there for me. …Yet,
I still don’t know what I need.
I think this is all part of my sickness.
The reason I was ever so afraid to love you-
So afraid of the possible effects,
that I’m caught in the endless cycle of hurting myself….
…How can I hope to be where you are?
/ / /
And I’m holding out my hand to you…
Music/title: Sleepless Club (WEKEED Boot); Lorde vs Flume
Take the pill, make it too real.
The other day I forgot my old address. I’m sitting pretty on the throne.
There’s nothing more I want, except to be alone..
. . ….. … ..
“There was no real sense of life,
because she had nothing to contrast it with.
The lower you fall, the higher you’ll fly.
The farther you run, the more God wants you back.
Only if we’re caught and punished can we be saved.”
~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club
/ / /
It’s a day for words and curves.
Where do you see yourself at the end of your life?
Comment for me.
Music/title: Undertow; Tool
“How could I let this bring me,
back to my knees?”
. .. …
Half the year spent trying not to die-
the other half desperately remembering how to live..
I’d love to promise you more.
To promise the new.
The oh so illusive happiness.
Can’t you see me trying?
Here’s to hoping everything current stays in this past…
Music/title: Riptide; Vance Joy
“Oh, oh, and they come unstuck.”
. .. ….
Go back five years ago,
and I’d never have taken it.
Go back a few years ago,
and I’d have definitely considered it.
Go back a week ago,
and I almost asked you for it.
You always find a cure before I find the disease.
….Can we do this again?
/ / /
And she’s been living on the highest shelf…